The Gayest Compilation Ever Made

by Various Artists

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about

The songs on this album were written and recorded exclusively for Everyone is Gay. All proceeds go toward helping Everyone Is Gay continue their efforts at bringing change and awareness to middle school, high school, and college campuses across the United States.

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released January 1, 2012

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Everyone Is Gay Brooklyn, New York

Everyone Is Gay works to improve the lives of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning/Queer (LGBTQ) youth using a three-pronged approach: providing honest advice to youth while keeping them laughing; talking to students in an effort to create caring, compassionate school environments; and working with parents of LGBTQ kids to help foster an ongoing dialogue and deeper understanding. ... more

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Track Name: Bess Rogers - Everyone Is Gay (except for me)
everyone is gay
except for me
sometimes i wish that i could be
cuz all of my girlfriends
are sexy lesbians
yea, everyone is gay
except for me

everyone is gay
except for me
havin fun at secret gay parties
i just don't know why
i can't be a little bi
oh, everyone is gay
except or me

oh being straight (oh being straight)
can be so dull
when everyone you know
is homosexual
they're gay (gay, gay, gay)

everyone is gay except for me
sometimes i wish that i could be
i'd ask for advice on
kristin and dannielle's website

everyone is gay dot com
except for me
Track Name: Jenny Owen Youngs - The Ballad of Kristin & Dannielle (An Abridged History of Everyone Is Gay Dot Com)
Well well Kristin and Dannielle have a website, they give advice, and they'll tell you what to do
If you're in love with your best friend or you're having girl problems they know just what to do!

Once upon a time in New York City lived two girls with different-length hair
Kristin wore dresses, Dannielle wore vests, but there was one thing they certainly shared
One day lying in the grass in Union Square Park eating ice cream and talking bout cats
Kristin said "Hey it's like everyone's gay" and Dannielle said "Hey I'm down with that"

Well well Kristin and Dannielle have a website they give advice, and they'll tell you what to do
If you're in love with your best friend or you're having boy problems they know just what to do!

So their website was built and the questions rolled in from people of every kind
From grandparents, teenagers, grown ups and kids all wanting some answers to find
Kristin and Dannielle they rolled up their sleeves, cos when you type, sleeves can get in the way
And set to typing out guidance for everyone, be they bisexual, straight or gay
Or any member of the other sub-groups that fall under the LGBTQ umbrella

Well well Kristin and Dannielle have a website they give advice, and they'll tell you what to do
If you're in love with your best friend or you have some gay children they know just what to do!

Heartache is heartache no matter who you love
K&D of EIG want to remind you what you're made of
It's good stuff

Well well Kristin and Dannielle have a website they give advice, and they'll tell you what to do
If you're in love with your best friend or you're having gender-unspecific problems
Well well Kristin and Dannielle have a website they give advice, and they'll tell you what to do
If you're in love with your best friend or you're having cat problems they know just what to do!
Track Name: Mike Doughty - Gay As Fuck
On the Kinsey scale I'm a 6.5
I'm super-groovy and super alive

And I want to rock with you
Yeah I want to rock with you

'Cause I'm gay as fuck
Gay like a motherfucker

I want the right to marry, man--fuck a parade
And I want you to be my funky bridesmaid

'Cause the people want to rock with you
Yeah, they want to rock with you

'Cause I'm gay as fuck
Gay like a motherfucker
Track Name: Vintage Gramma - My BFF'Z Graight.
This is my best friend, Amanda
This is my best friend, Dannielle
This is me, Kate
LETS SING A SONG ABOUT IT
OKAY

My best friend really likes to wear dresses / jean shorts
My best friend enjoys walking in the park
My best friend listens to Jack Johnson / Tegan & Sara
My best friend is afraid of the dark

She has a pretty girlfriend
but I'm her girlfriend too
She tried to be vegan
but I told her that that's ew
We both watch 90210
this line rhymes with too
Swedish Fish, Tyra Banks, Gossip Girl, Mary Kate, Ashley Olsen's on a date
WITH WHO? QUICK! JEZEBEL!

Chorus
My best friend's gay
We're not allergic to each other
My best friend's straight
we're both cold when it's cold
We're basically the same
except for in the sack
When my best friend calls
I call her right back
My best friend's Gay/Straight
Yea-ah

My best friend likes to eat bacon / fake bacon
My best friend still cares for 'Nsync
My best friend JET OF TO THE HAMPTONS / NEW YEARS IN PARIS
My best friend would like something to drink
(i'd like a drink)

She has a little bro
but I'm her lil bro too (you're my best bro)
She likes fancy shoes
but I'm like Jim Choo Who?
We both watch 90210
and this line rhymes with too
Swedish Fish, Tyra Banks, Gossip Girl, Mary Kate, Ashley Olsen ate some cake
WHAT?? PROVE THAT!! QUICK! JEZEBEL!

Chorus

Bridge
So there's a best friend
and then her best friend
Then there's the girl
who's not quite the best friend
Sometimes you find your friends
after their already friends
But that doesn't matter
we can ALL BE BEST--

My best friend's gay / straight
yours probably is too
My best friend's gay / straight
LET'S GO TO THE ZOO

My best friend's gay / straight
My best friend's gay / straight
My best friend's gay / straight

My best friend's great.
Track Name: Lightyear - It's Time
Wouldn't you come and save my life
If it came down to it
Wouldn't you stand by my side
If it came down to it
I don't know how they think they know
our hearts

Beat better alone
beat beat better apart

it's time to see what's right in front of me
don't be afraid
our love will set us free
it's time
it's time
something is calling your name

love is love

We are the unknown to simple minds
but time moves on time moves on
all that we know is how to live our lives
as time moves on, time moves on

I dont know how they think they know what's right
when i've never told them a thing about my life

it's time to see what's right in front of me
don't be afraid
our love will set us free
it's time
it's time
something is calling your name

If everything's a choice
then i choose to lose your voice
if you can choose your blues
then show me every hue
if you can choose your
red hot hot hot love
then i i want mine to be right
you don't know me
my bark's got bite
if something's smellin' off
i stay and fight
gotta fight
like a man
but i'm a girl
now what's the plan
gonna use your mind or gonna lose your mind
when i bump and grind
up on this girls behind
i dont give a damn
i'm gentle as a lamb
flow love as well as a white girl can
and i know someone above
knows love is love is love is love

it's time to see what's right in front of me
don't be afraid
our love will set us free
it's time
it's time
something is calling your name
Track Name: Dan Romer - Love Who We Love
I was born in the house I was raised in
And the town taught me all that I know
But when I saw you there
I just wasn't prepared
For the way that you'd tell me to go

I knew that this couldn't be happening
After everything that we'd been through
I said "What did you mean
by those looks in between
all the words that you know weren't true?"

We love who we love
There's not much more that we can do
We love who we love
And I love you
And I love you


Well you know I can't tell you a story
Cause you know that I can't take the time
If I wasn't so sure
I'd have walked out the door
But I know you're supposed to be mine

When I look at your face it's unfocused
And they say the lines shouldn't be blurred
If the world wasn't ending I'd have time for pretending
So I don't care about what you've heard

We love who we love
There's not much more that we can do
We love who we love
And I love you
And I love you

I yell your name
You do the same
But no one makes a sound
But no one makes a sound

I scream the words
Until it hurts
But no one makes a sound
But no one makes a sound

We love who we love
There's not much more that we can do
We love who we love
And I love you
And I love you
Track Name: Ingrid Michaelson - Free
everyone needs to need someone
why can't we just let it be
everyone needs to love someone
why can't we just let love run

free, free, free
let it free
let it run free
Track Name: Charlene Kaye - I'd Go Gay (for Tina Fey)
Hey girl
now, I don't usually bat for your team, but for you,
i'll make an exception

See there's this girl I know who's everything I wanna be
I respect her so much, I would get down with her sexually
And if I had her number, I'd be hitting her up text-ually
Tell me Tina, how can I get you next to me?

Always running through my head, I think of her incessantly
There's something bout the way she wears that Snuggie so suggestively
Take off your bossypants, come here and do it on the desk with me
Oh you know that I would but you won't, cuz you don't like the ladies

Cuz in that episode of 30 rock you wouldn't bang that hot chick Jack set you up with
cuz he thought you were a lesbian
But you're not a lesbian
You just dress really bad
But I don't care bout that, cuz

I would go gay for Tina Fey
(but only Tina Fey, she's the only girl for whom I would go gay)
She's a woman of grace, booty and brains
And even though I'm straight,

She made me almost think Sarah Palin was okay
(key word almost, and that's a really big deal, girl)
so if she said ok
Any old day
I would go gay
For Tina Fey

She hangs with the guys, but looks fly in a micro mini dress
Got legs for miles and a smile that could kill the rest
I'm the proud owner
of a lady boner
And it's my MO to get closer, I can't turn back now that I know her

It started as a girl crush, but I think this could be love
Don't tell me those eyes on my TV screen aren't looking at my stuff
Your shoes are hideous and you never wear makeup
It's just like someone knew from above that

I would go gay for Tina Fey
(but only Tina Fey, she's the only girl for whom I would go gay)
She's got Emmys to waste, booty and brains
Even though I'm straight,

She made me almost think Sarah Palin was a babe
so if she said ok
any old day
I would go gay
For Tina Fey
Track Name: Greg Laswell - Everybody'zzzzz Gay
I wake up and fry and egg
And scratch the itch on my leg
And then to get coffee
And then off to the bank
And if I need to I go fill up my gas tank
And everywhere I look, I see
That everybody is just like me
Yeah, everybody is gay

I'm gay
You're gay
Everyone is fuckin' gay
Get over it
Get over it

Everybody's gay

I'm gay
You're gay
Everyone is fuckin' gay
Get over it
Get over it

Everybody's gay
Everybody'zzzzzzz gay
Everybody'zzzzzzz gay
Track Name: Lelia Broussard - Super Fucking Gay (Stay Gay)
Everyone is gay would like to thank you
For giving them your money
And supporting their cause
They think you are super attractive
They’d like to kiss you on the mouth
And tell you to your face

But all you got is me
To sing you this song
Yeah all you got is me
To tell you
That you’re really hot
And you’re really cool


And you’re super fuckin gay
Super fuckin gay
Gay
Don’t go getting straight
We think that you’re great
Stay gay
Super fucking gay
Gay

Gay gay gay gay gay gay
Track Name: Krannielle - Seeing The Forest For The Trees (a rap about cats)
This one goes out to Trey & Janet.

Yo, boo, you got somethin to say?
I can't hear you,
I mean I can, I just can't understand.
What do you mean?

Take it to the streets
With the paws on your feets
Pick me up something to eat
I'll eat the cheese don't like the meat
But I'll take a sweet treat
You feel the heat
Jump out your seat
When we're finished with this beat
You'll tell your friends, please hit repeat!

Cats, cats, cats (x6)

Just yesterday, talkin' bout kittens,
talkin' bout Janet,
talkin' bout my boy Trey.
Kittens grow to cats and cats keep growin'
Then they look at you like,
Who are you? Wait...
Who am I? Wait...
What do I want? Wait...
Feed me bitch, meow.

We love cats, we're ladies (who like ladies)
Just don't call us cat ladies

Cats, cats, cats (x6)

(cat noises)
(repeat bridge)